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Who doesn't remember their first kiss? The first kiss might have happened
somewhere around the third grade when a precocious little Romeo-in-the-making
took a dare and planted a big sloppy kiss right on the lips of the cutest
little girl in the room.
"Wow" he thinks, "there might be something to this kissing thing!"
"Yuck," she thinks, "if he tries that again, I'm going to knock his head
And the stage has been set for all of the kissing that will most certainly
follow over their lifetimes although she is going to learn to enjoy the kissing
process as much as he does eventually.
Kissing has always been a form of intimacy between men and women, of course,
but kissing has also been used to express love between mothers, fathers and
children. As children we always wanted our good-night-kisses and hugs. They
told us that we were loved and safe. That remembered emotion of love and
safety while being hugged and kissed as children by our parents stays with
us throughout our adult lives.
Sometimes adults think of kissing only as a precursor to the sex act. These
are the adults who mistakenly believe that kissing is only physical. Kissing
is physical but it is also mental and emotional and it does not only involve
lips and tongues. Kissing between a man and a woman conveys many meanings
and if it doesn't then it is totally unsuccessful and meaningless. You might
as well have shaken hands or slapped one another on the back.
Kissing is a process!
Kissing begins with the eyes. When a man a woman look at each other they
should begin to experience the kiss that will follow long before it actually
happens. If a man just grabs a woman and kisses her without preparing her
for the kiss, it will come off a lot like that first third grade kiss. He
might like it but she most certainly will not.
Finger tips are a part of a kiss. When a man touches a woman's face with
just the tips of his fingers in a gentle caress or she touches his face with
the tip of her fingers in a gentle caress, the kiss is in its early stages
but it isn't ready to happen yet.
Hands are a part of a kiss. He can cup her face in both of his hands or she
can cup his face in both of her hands. They can gently stroke one another's
arms and start to build the emotion that will come when the kiss actually
Lips are part of a kiss. Gentle little kisses on cheeks, foreheads, eyelids
and throats are precursors to a real kiss.
Arms are part of a kiss. Wrap your arms around him or her and draw gently
forward. Gentle is the key word.
Now for the finishing touch. Lips and tongues meet and it is important to
remember that the most sensuous part of the tongue is not the tip but the
middle. Caressing with finger tips and hands should continue as the lips
and tongues meet.
There! Now you have been satisfactorily kissed!