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Raging Hearts Review

Free dating tips, advice, news and resources to keep you up to date on the latest dating information.

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Conversation Starters

I suppose everybody has been on one of THOSE dates at one time or another. You know the ones I mean. They are just awkward encounters. Short bursts of something that vaguely resembles conversation and then long periods of strained silences. Both parties to the date are checking their every few minutes to see how much longer until it is OVER.

Often these silent dates are blind dates or first dates. The two people participating in the date are usually quiet types. (Maybe that's why whoever arranged this date thought the two people were "perfect" for each other.)

There is no universal reason why people are quite. Sometimes they are just 'B' type personalities. Sometimes they are just shy. Sometimes they are afraid of saying something 'wrong'. It doesn't matter what they reason is, the strong silent type and the shy quite type just aren't natural conversationalists.

However, with just a little preparation, those long awkward silences can be avoided on dates even by people who are very quiet. There is one thing that even the very quietest of souls will do and that is they will answer a direct question. Granted, sometimes they give short one-word answers but it's a start.

The dictionary defines 'conversation' as: "informal interchange of thoughts, information, etc., by spoken words; oral communication between persons; talk; colloquy."

A friend of mine told me about the first date that she had with the man she eventually married. The date had been arranged by a mutual friend. They met as agreed and introduced themselves and then that deadly silence set in almost immediately. My friend said that this is what happened next:

My friend: "So where did you go to college?"
Date: "Cornell."
Silence
My friend: "Did you belong to a fraternity?"
Date: "Yeah."
Silence
My friend: "It too bad you didn't graduate."
Date: "Huh?"
My friend: (With a smile) "You obviously failed oral communication!"

There was a long pause and then he laughed, she laughed, the ice was broken and the rest, as they say, is history.

A lot of people don't think well under pressure. There isn't anything wrong with that and conversational techniques can be learned. The most important thing is a little preparation. Preparation can ease tense nerves, relieve stress and start the flow of easy conversation.

Obviously, both parties to a date wanted to be there or they never would have agreed to the date in the first place. You know whether conversation comes easily for you or not. If it doesn't, then take a little time to prepare for conversation. Think of some conversation starter questions. It isn't even a bad idea if you are very nervous to write the questions down and take them with you.

Some great conversation starters are:

1. Where did you go to college?
2. What kind of music do you like?
3. Is there any kind of food that you really hate?
4. What is a movie that you have seen more than once?
5. Do you have brothers and sisters?
6. What is the dumbest thing you have ever done in your life?
7. What is your most unusual talent?
8. Do you have a pet?
9. How did you meet (mutual friend)?
10. What is your favorite football team?

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